15 questions about Jack and Ralph
by Lucyinthesky1996
Summary: In which we dive into the depths of Jack and Ralph's complex yet loving relationship.


**15 questions about Jack and Ralph.**

**1. Who is the "man" in the relationship?**

Most definitely Jack – but that doesn't mean Ralph is a pushover. He knows just when and how to put his chief in line.

**2. Who cooks normally? **

Ralph does most of the cooking on the account that Jack has no knowledge whatsoever on how to do the task. It's fairly easy though, seeing as all they ever cook is pig.

**3. How often do they fight?**

A _lot_ more than most normal couples would - mostly over hunting/lighting the fire/the proper way to discipline the children. But in the end, after one of them storms off and the other spends the whole day crying in the cave, they reconcile and there's lots of cuddling.

**4. What do they do when they're away from each other? **

Ralph tries to distract himself by building unneeded shelters or playing hide-and-seek with the littleuns.

Jack (like any manly man) shrugs it off but always ends up pacing up and down the cave, ready to leap up on Ralph as soon as he returns.

**5. Nicknames for each other? **

Jack's nicknames go along the lines of: Chief, Mr. Merridew, Honey, The Bear (rawr) and on very rare occurences, Thoughtless Bastard.

Ralph's, however, are more like: Chiefess, Gorgeous, Desert Flower (Jack can be quite a gentleman when he wants to be) and for when the arguments really hit the roof, Ungrateful Bitch.

**6. Do they like kids?**

Naturally, Ralph adores kids and is something of a surrogate mother to the littleuns (it sometimes get to the point where the smallest ones are calling him 'Mummy') And being a natural mother bear, he will come between anything – whether it be man or pig – that tries to harm one of his 'babies.'

Jack will act as if he doesn't give a toss about the littleuns - then the next minute he'll be going crazy with worry because one of them has wandered off.

**7. Who steals the covers at night?**

Due to the fact they only have a small pigskin between them, most probably Jack. This can be solved with some tickling, but most of the time they end up managing to survive the night with each other's body heat.

**8. Who kissed who first? **

Jack, after the two of them got into a massive argument about building shelters. He didn't know how else to shut the blonde up, considering Ralph is much scarier in a fight than he anticipated due to the fact he never seems to run out of words. Needless to say, the fight was quickly resolved after this action.

**9. Who made the first move?**

Jack, right after the fire incident. You could say it was _his_ way of apologising.

**10. Who started the relationship? **

Believe it or not, Simon and Roger.

Both knew how the two felt about each other and made it their duty to bring them together. They did it how any best friends would – by pushing them towards each other and ordering them to kiss.

**11. Are they married? If so, who proposed?**

Yes, they are married. And as you guessed, Jack proposed.

It was a fairly unusual proposal; seeing as there are no jewelery shops on the island, they had to make do with a ring carved from Roger's spear. Ralph fainted as soon as Jack showed him the ring, and after Simon and Maurice had finally brought him round (by drenching him in water) he thought he'd dreamt the whole thing.

When they showed him the ring for the _second_ time, he fainted all over again.

**12. How do they discipline the children?**

Being the ultimate disciplinarian, Jack is a strong believer in corporal punishment. Ralph, on the other hand, is strongly against physical punishment. He demonstrated his disapproval when he came across the chief holding one of the littleuns between his legs, ready to smack him for doing God knows what. Next thing Jack knew, he'd been hit around the head with his own spear and when his eyesight finally adjusted, he was on the floor with Ralph standing over him, the littleun huddling behind him.

His only words were, "Don't you _ever_ touch my baby again."

**13. Who cusses more? **

Jack. Especially when Ralph is away and he has to cook the goddamn pigs himself. He probably got it from hanging out with Roger.

**14. What would they do if the other one was hurt? **

Ralph would remain calm and carefully clean Jack's wounds, settling him with a few tender kisses.

Jack, on the other hand, would go into a blind panic and set out to destroy whoever_ dared_ harm his beloved.

However, for a mere flesh wound, just lots of hugs and kisses.

**15. Would they ever consider having kids?**

Jack would tell you they have enough kids. Ralph disagrees.


End file.
